FIZZMUSTARD’S “ARTIFACT” EJUICE ANALYSIS AND REVIEW

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PRESENTATION:
  • Gorgeous labels, with appropriate warnings and childproof capping. The labels look professional and don't give any "immature" vibes. Very classy, and very elegant all while staying with the same theme.
  • Batch numbers and Born dates. Check.
  • These liquids aren't tinted by food coloring, it's just the natural coloring of the ingredients used, but it gives all these liquids this beautiful hue that just screams quality. 
  • They also came in this nice cloth sack that was like opening an old "artifact" in some hidden temple somewhere. Very nice touch. 
  • There's not much else you can ask for from the presentation side. This is what happens when you have a professional do your product design. Well done. 
  • 10/10
BUCKLAND:
  • Peach and almond, butter, brown sugar, walnut
  • Absolutely rich and bold
  • Orange rind note
  • addicting
  • tastes like a bag of organic nuts and almonds, candied in brown sugar, with dried apricots, while walking through a woodsy forest
  • Incredibly complex, hard to pinpoint exactly what notes your getting, in the best way possible. It's like sticking your hand into a bag of trail mix and getting whatever comes out. Maybe a little more nuts, maybe a little more peach, but never anything unwanted...like raisins or some shit
  • very smooth, and clean
  • if you like nutty bold flavors, this is for you, if you like apricot, stone fruit, peach flavors, this is for you, if you like deeper bolder and woodsier flavors, this is for you
  • I absolutely LOVE this flavor. Hiking and this flavor go hand in hand. 
  • I would've LOVED to see another fruit note in here, maybe some kind of dark berry, because of how bold and rich it is. It could've been cut up a little more which would've added a little more excitement and longevity in the vape. 
  • It's almost as if this flavor is too big and too bold. You vape it and you're kicked in the head with flavor, but these profiles aren't really the kind of flavors you want to kick you in the head.
  • Because of this, this flavor is hard to pin as an ADV. It seems just too BIG and too much to vape all day. 
  • 8.75/10
SKULLFLOWER
  • "Lemon Sorbet, Macerated Berries, Kumquat Preserves"
  • Lemon sorbet flavor, almost lemonade like, but a light "carbonation" gives it the sorbet flavor. Calling it anything other than a sorbet would've been a disservice. Excellent way to interpret a sorbet. Shows the skill of Fizz.
  • Kumquat, which is pretty much a more sour tangerine, blends in nicely with the lemon flavor.  This flavor is blended in so nicely that it's almost hard to pinpoint if your palate isn't well defined. This flavor adds another notch of citrus and raises the excitement up a little higher. 
  • The raspberry flavor is there, but almost nonexistent. This is due to the power of both citruses. You can tell the raspberry plays down the citrus enough to make it much more smooth and enjoyable. It adds the sweetness necessary to bring up the entire mix as well.
  • This flavor is a wonderfully light and sweet mix. The lemon sorbet really stands out, and the kumquat flavor adds that extra touch of excitement that really changes the way the flavor is portrayed. You can taste exactly where this flavor is going, then the kumquat and berry comes in and flips it upside down. 
  • What especially impresses me is the way Fizz has balanced this flavor. The balance between the two citruses is hard to do, and the way he incorporated the berry to further etch the line between the two, was a wonderful addition. 
  • The problem with this flavor is the actual flavor profiles, and I'm having a hard time picking this up. I'm not particularly fond of a kumquat and lemon sorbet mix, the two citruses just don't really work well for me.
  • It's like there are 3 main flavors in here, that all would do well by themselves, but together create this clash of sour and tart fruit. 
  • Even though they are balanced nicely, and all perfectly sweetened, it just doesn't produce a flavor I can keep coming back to
  • 7.5/10
FONTANA
  • "Bartlett Pear, Kaffir Lime, Dairy Cream"
  • This flavor is FANTASTIC
  • It's a super sweet and ripe pear flavor, infused with lime, on a base of very light cream
  • The pear is the star of the flavor.
  • It's a delicious "Bartlett" pear. And for those who don't know what a Bartlett pear is, it's a nice sweet pear with a distinct citrus flavor that gives it it's unique flavor.
  • You can taste this pear on both ends of the flavor, the front and back. On the front is the citrus and sweet part of the pair. This is where the lime plays a big part of the flavor. And on the back you get that traditional pear taste, with it's subtle flavor profile that everyone associates with pear.
  • This is where Fizz's skills as a mixer really shine. He is able to really let the flavor speak for itself before adding in accompanying flavors, and this mix is the perfect example of that. It's a simple and traditional technique, that is often overlooked, but not for Fizz.
  • The "Kaffir" lime is a supporting flavor that accentuates the pear. It adds a layer of depth in the flavor that no other flavor profile would. There's nothing really special about the lime itself, so don't let the name fool you. But the lime is ESSENTIAL into making the flavor of this liquid what it is. 
  • The dairy cream just bases everything out. Without this base, there is no gauge for where the lime and the pear end. You're not going to taste like a creamy mix, or a milky mix, but what you will taste is a softness at the end of the vape. I would call this cream more of a light whip cream because it's not intrusive and doesn't add any weight.
  • All together this mix is like a dollop of light whip cream atop a bowl of Bartlett pears that were drizzled in a sweet lime syrup. Which sounds like a fucking heavenly dessert. 
  • I can't stop vaping this stuff. It's PERFECTLY blended, PERFECTLY sweetened, and PERFECTLY mixed. The only tiny gripe I have with this flavor is the lime and citrus from it. It's just a little too up front, and detracts a bit from the pear. If the lime was toned down just a touch more, I feel the citrus would've been a little more balanced. 
  • This, to me, is what makes Fizz such a revered member of the scene. The fact that he can take a concept so simple and turn into a beautiful and delicious display of flavor. The flavor profiles in this mix just work, and rather than trying to turn these flavors into something they aren't he utilizes them in a way that is the most effective.
  • This flavor hits every single part of the palate. It's sweet, but not too it's off putting. It's tart, but not too tart it hurts. It's creamy, but not too creamy it's bland and heavy. It's fruity, but not too fruity it's linear.
  • It's a perfect blend of sweet, tart, creamy, fruity, and refreshing. An absolute BANGER.
  • If he is able to do what he did with this flavor, find some kind of base that works with the accompanying flavors, to Skullflower, I would've enjoyed Skullflower much more. 
  • This one has been in my rotation daily. It's perfect for anytime you need a refreshing vape. 
  • 9.75/10
GENOA
  • "Breakfast fruit, cereal flakes, almond milk"
  • This flavor was the most surprising for me
  • When I first tasted this flavor I got the same old "fruit loop" flavor I've gotten from every other cereal ejuice. I got that citrusy lemony grainy flavor. Whether it was flavor association, or vapers tongue, I wasn't getting what I was supposed to
  • I was disappointed.
  • Then after some time, I revisited it, and I'm so glad I did. 
  • This is the most accurate representation of a cereal anyone has produced. 
  • I don't taste what the description is claiming exactly. I get more of a true, crunch berries in plain milk flavor. 
  • I get a strawberry, blueberry, crunchberry flavor, in a bowl with milk. A fresh bowl. One I poured right out the box into the bowl, with milk right out the fridge, and then a spoonful right into my mouth.
  • It really is tasty
  • It's similar to what you'd expect from a cereal vape, and doesn't really have that citrus flavor (I'm thinking that citrus note I got before is from the sweetness of the fruits and the sweetness of the cereal. Comes off at times, lemony, and is non existent when vaped fresh). But it still stands on it's own, and is a perfectly viable alternative to someone who likes cereal and wants something a little different.
  • The vape tongue does set in early on this flavor, as it does with every cereal, but when vaped fresh you can taste every single crunch berry in the mix as well as the milk. Also, any of Fizz's other flavors work great as palate cleansers, or flavor re-setters.
  • Do I get breakfast fruit, cereal flakes, and almond milk? No. But I get a delicious and curiously accurate crunchberry flavor that is playful and exciting. 
  • It's also balanced VERY well, a common theme throughout these juices. It's not too heavy on the cereal, it's not too heavy on the cream, it's not too heavy on the grain. It's like a proportionate ratio of cereal to milk. 
  • The only thing that disappoints me about this flavor is that I feel Fizz played it a little too safe with this flavor. He had a chance to really do something interesting, and set his cereal flavor wayyy apart from the rest of them out there. But instead he tried to create the "best vape cereal" instead of his own version of one. Maybe I'm thinking too critically of this flavor, and I admit I might be, but in the other flavors you see these risks Fizz is taking. Here you don't see that same kind of risk taking, and if there was one flavor I would've loved to see it, it would've been in the cereal dept. 
  • But I can't base the score on what it could've been. I need to base it on what it is. And to me it's a great crunchberry cereal, that's better than any other "traditional" crunchberry flavor out, hands down. Blended and balanced with masterful precision, but leaves me a little bored and wanting more. 
  • 8/10
WIDOWS WALK
  • "Mediterranean fruit, Botanical Tea, Mint Leaf"
  • This flavor is one of those flavors that people are going to love or hate.
  • For me, I absolutely love it, and think it's a staple for what a mentholated flavor should taste like
  • It's an icy mint flavor, with a touch of tea leaf, and a light base of grape
  • For one, if you mix, you know those profiles are DOPE. So much props for thinking of that flavor profile.
  • The execution is also masterful.
  • When you exhale you taste this beautifully crafted white grape and tea leaf through this ice cold mint base
  • The mint is the star of the show. It's a peppermint type flavor, but what makes it great is that the actual flavor of the mint is what comes through throughout the entire vape. Most menthol flavors are too strong on that artificial mint flavor, or too strong on that ice feeling. This actually feels like a true mint, and tastes like one as well. I wouldn't be surprised if real mint was used, cause it's SPOT ON. It's SO refreshing and anytime you need a break from a hot day, this is the stuff you want to pick up.
  • The rest of the flavors take a back seat, and are subtle. They serve as a catalyst to turn the entire mix into something that is special and unique. You pick up on the fruit immediately and you taste it without having to find it, yet it just sits quietly in the background. This is VITAL into the success in this flavor, because if it were too prominent you would lose the essence of that stunning mint. Though I do wish the fruits or the teas were taken up just a notch to allow more depth and more body, because this flavor is light in all aspects. 
  • Now if you don't care for mentholated flavors, or minty flavors than you might not like this mix. But I urge you to at least try it because it really is an icy flavor done right. I promise you it'll be worth it. 
  • If you are a fan of mentholated juice, throw out your Hawk Sauce, and pick this shit up. This is the standard. 
  • 9/10
CONCLUSION
This entire line is a great display of masterful crafting, precise balance, and passionate execution. Each flavor is delicious, and each flavor can stand on their own. Sure, there are a few things that I wasn't excited with and some flavor profiles that could be improved on, but as a whole I'm thoroughly impressed. For me to enjoy every single flavor in a lineup surprised the shit, and has NEVER been done before by any company. The liquids all taste so clean and so smooth and you'll find no diketones here, due to Fizz's care for excellent ingredients and nicotine sourcing. You can tell the level of standard he had for his juice line, was extremely high, and the result is one the best, complete lines, to date. I wish I hadn't made this line my first e-liquid review because I don't want you all to think I give out high scores to every juice that comes along. It's just that each of these mixes are fucking amazing. You can honestly pick up every flavor and not be disappointed. From the presentation, to the quality of the ingredients, to the flavor profiles, this entire line is something special. 
 
OVERALL SCORE: 88/100
 
"a great display of masterful crafting, precise balance, and passionate execution"

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